Lazy Day Link-a-palooza: Marriage Equality, Purity Culture, and That Awful Song

by Camille on April 19, 2013

While completing graduate school projects, building a house, and raising a toddler, I’ve sadly neglected my Google Reader for quite some time now. (And apparently, I’m going to have to soon find a replacement as Google is killing the reader. Bleh.  Insert whining here.) Anyway, there are just too many amazing bloggers out there, and I’ll never get fully caught up, but here are some posts I’ve found encouraging and thought-provoking over the past few weeks: 

I met the author of the following posts through a Facebook group created for bloggers who reviewed Rachel Held Evan’s A Year of Biblical Womanhood. She’s bold, unapologetic, and awesome in sharing her views on Jesus and gay rights.

Blown away by love, from Word of a Woman

Sidenote: People always say you should fear his judgement as he will be the judge on the last day. Personally, I think you should be super relieved and overjoyed that he will be your judge. If he is anything like he was on earth (which was the exact representation of who God is), he will find ways to forgive that you cannot even imagine. He will judge with mercy and compassion. This is the man who came to save all. Who died for all. He took the full weight of all the worst the world and humanity has to offer and he absorbed it and he looked it in the face and he pronounced love and forgiveness. BOOM!

The Bible trumps the law of the United States? from Word of a Woman

When you tell me that the Bible supersedes the law of the United States, and that we should strive and work to make “what the Bible says” law. I start breaking out in hives. I mean, as my husband so eloquently asked this morning, “My question to you is, whose interpretation of “the bible and the Word of God” should “trump the laws of this country”? David Koresh’s? Pat Robertson’s? Mine? Yours? 


Elizabeth Esther and many others in the blogosphere have spent a lot of time discussing the impact of the Church’s role in creating a “purity culture.” I never considered the potential dangers of purity rings or pledges until recently, but Elizabeth makes some incredibly important points.

A ring by spring or else you #FAIL godly womanhood! from Elizabeth Esther

Although I’m as eager to critique Victoria’s Secret and Beyonce as the next person, it’s extraordinarily problematic for Christians to avoid interrogating their own culture as well, and the ways evangelicalism also objectifies young women by focusing on their pure bodies—and later, their fertile wombs—as the best, most glorified assets those born female can offer to others, without giving so much as a nod to women’s other potential gifts as leaders, thinkers, doers in the world.


In this post, Elizabeth shames Prodigal Magazine for publishing a piece that seems to praise women who tolerate domestic violence in pursuit of God’s will.

Your husband is NOT God for you...from Elizabeth Esther

Your husband is NOT God for you.
Your husband is NOT your Higher Power.
Your husband will NOT answer to God for you.


And this….just made me laugh. Sorry if it offends anyone, but this song is seriously awful.

Colbert takes on “Accidental Racist” and writes a song of his own from Matthew Paul Turner


It’s always easier for us to believe the ugliness is worlds away, but Jamie reminds us that we have to confront the ugly on our own church pews to make a difference in the world.

Sweet Little Baby Prostitutes from Jamie, the Very Worst Missionary

We can keep rescuing children from slavery for forever. But if we never address the growing appetite for these kids, it will never end. When we talk about how the people buying sex in India and Asia are often times carrying passports from the U.S., Canada, and Great Britain, we must be willing to admit that they’re living in our neighborhoods, working in our offices and, yes, sitting in our churches. With extraordinary Grace, we need to talk about our own sexual brokenness, we need to invite healing, we need to pray for redemption, and we need to bravely call for justice.


One of many reasons I support marriage equality.

The biblical definition of marriage and its relevance to marriage equality from Rage Against the Minivan

Since when did the biblical definition of something become the litmus test for state freedoms?  A Hindu person does not agree with a Christian’s biblical definition of God. And yet, most of us would agree that Hindus have the right to worship, congregate, and apply to the state to  enjoy whatever rights are afforded to a religious organization.  Their right to worship in their own way does not detract from mine, nor does it threaten me in any way. It also does not diminish my own definition of God to affirm and support their rights.


Some thoughts for strict-complementarian dudes who think women should be seen and not heard. I’d encourage you to read Exhibit A and B as well. Crazy good stuff. Preach it, sisters!

The Absurd Legalism of Gender Roles, Exhibit C: A woman can teach me as long as I can’t see her from Rachel Held Evans

Piper is essentially arguing that so long as he does not have to acknowledge my humanity, so long as I keep a safe distance so he is unaware of the pitch of my voice and the presence of my breasts, he can, perhaps, learn something about the Bible from me. So long as I am not “in-his-face” (his words) with my femaleness, it will be easier for him to treat me as someone worth learning from; it will be easier for him to treat me like a man.


A few weeks ago, I heard a speaker address a group of women, and in the first five minutes, she mentioned Debi Pearl. Actually, she recommended Debi Pearl with flattering language. Annnnnd……I pretty much wrote her off at that moment. I had to force myself to stay. Having read many reviews of and excerpts from Pearl’s work, I find it horrific that her ideas are still being taught.

The abusive teachings of Michael and Debi Pearl from Rachel Held Evans

At one point, Pearl encourages a young mother whose husband routinely beat her and threatened to kill her with a kitchen knife to stop “blabbing about his sins” and win him back by showing him more respect

Sudden aggressive outbursts are part of what it means to be a man, according to Pearl. “The wisest way to handle the aggressive husband is by not taking personal offense,” she advises. “Avoid provoking him.”


As the mother of an increasingly transracial family, I’m incredibly grateful for the voice of the adoptee and the lessons she offers here.

White adoptive parents of transracial adoptees: Being non-racist does not mean being color-blind, from Lost Daughters

Okay, White people, here’s a helpful insight–“non-White” people, we don’t want you to be color-blind, i.e., we don’t want you to view us as “just like White people,” because, well, we ain’t just like White people. And it’s actually pretty ignorant to think that the standard for “normal” is White people. (Of course, I can’t speak for every living non-White person, but I can speak for some.)


Just so you know, Jen snuck into my head and stole my thoughts for this post. I forgive her. I had kind of a “doldrum-y” couple of weeks, but I’ve been attacking one day at a time, and things are feeling better.

Stuck in the Doldrums: An Attack Plan, by Jen Hatmaker

Here is the bummer about the doldrums: the very efforts needed to lift out are the same things you’ve lost energy for. The simplest remedies feel like weights drudged up from the bottom of the ocean. Your mind knows to do them, but your will refuses to cooperate. Which makes your mind furious and mired in shame, which makes your will dig its heels and wallow, which makes you realize you are turning on yourself, you are your own worst enemy. No one can oppress me like myself.


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